Blue doesn’t exist in the world of a blind man. Yet it exists in our world, or doesn’t it?
Our lives are based on many pillars, facts, conceptions, feelings and much more. Taking one of the most rigid ones, lets say facts, what are they? Aren’t they dependent on the surrounding factors? If the factors are changing, won’t the facts change as well? So I guess it is not that solid after all. Not being sure about the most rigid pillar brings us to the question:
Can you be sure of anything in this world?
I’m not sure of anything anymore. Which is why I cannot cling to believes about myself that were formed long ago.
I’ve reached a level in my life where it’s really not an easy process to form an opinion or take a decision regarding any matter for how vague things are actually. I don’t know if I have forgotten how forming opinions is done, or if I just realized the complexity of it.
It’s true I just got out of a phase where I only wanted to be pulled by my own force to the ground and know where I’m exactly standing. But not so long, right after I figured out how and where to stand, I realized I must walk down one from the two paths that were out there waiting for me to discover. A restructuring is very much needed at this point. I need to redefine everything again now in order to collect some factors to help me take the right decision if such a thing really exist. I’m not sure if it’s a puzzle I need to solve or a painting that gets done by the one and only factor: Time.
What makes it harder for me is that I don’t know anymore if my thoughts were born in my head or planted there by others, for they happen slowly without you completely realizing it. The only funny thing in all of this is how some people think they know what’s best for you, or at least what’s not. Either they have a magical crystal ball, or have a magical crystal ball.
The hardest situations aren’t a heart-brain matters, but a heart-heart ones. Somehow you feel you are literally broken into two opposite parts and you want to keep both of them. Yet you simply can’t. Life is not easy, and it wasn’t even meant to be easy. It’s a mix of everything, literally everything but easy alone.
All I want right now is to package it all in a nice box and send it off up there, to a place where nothing resides.. To send all reality.. uncertainty.. heartaches.. brain-aches.. and life knots.
They say life sometimes doesn’t give you something you want, not because you don’t deserve it, but because you deserve more. Can this be true? Can this uncertainty be a blessing in this world? Can it be a better option to live upon?
I’m not sure even why I’m writing this post. I mean, did you get anything out of it? Are you sure?